Moving back home after I graduated was not a clear-cut decision. I graduated in December so I didn’t have my classmates to commiserate with. My boyfriend and friends would still be at school and I actually applied for jobs in up there, thinking I could stay in my apartment and keep my same life, but with everyone else just in school while I worked. But I came to the decision that there was nothing professionally attractive about staying at school and home is a much more convenient location for what I want to do long-term.
This is also helped by the fact that I am not a FOMO type of person. I barely went out and did “college” things as it was when I actually attended college, so it’s not like I thought I would be missing out.
So the day after Christmas, my mom and I packed up my apartment and moved me back home.
Fast forward a month or so and I’m sitting at my desk, eating leftover popcorn that I took home from the movies last night. So it’s shaped up to be a good decision after all.
Socializing has always been a problem for me, and I feel that it’s definitely exacerbated now that I’m home and have approximately one friend that lives nearby. I’m an introvert and perfectly happy being by myself and I find it incredibly hard to make new friendships. I do feel like I miss out on things because I spend so much of my time alone, though, so I’m really working on being a bit more outgoing. It’s not so easy and I can’t say that I’ve sparked any new friendships yet, but hopefully soon. I strike up conversations with my coworkers in hopes that one day we’ll get together for drinks after work. I joined meetup.com but have yet to go to any. But I have gone to see The Commuter at noon by myself on a Friday, so I don’t know if I’m really putting in the requisite effort for friendship.
Finding a job was, of all things, not the most difficult. I’m working three days a week and I’ve been able to use my extra two weekdays to focus on side hustle work. I’m trying to get consistent on blogging and selling clothes on Poshmark (follow me at @sserani #helpmeImpoor), but it’s also been nice to hang out with my dogs and go to breakfast with my grandparents. Working is good to get me out of the house, but my schedule is kind of like easing into real life rather than being thrown in.
I’m lucky that I get to have my own space, but I am getting itchy for home decor. Some days I find myself wandering into Target and decorating an imaginary home that doesn’t yet exist. Currently, my bedroom walls are robin’s egg blue, which I love but isn’t very conducive to a different color/decor scheme. But it’s nice to fantasize about the future.
I think what was most important in my decision to come back home was that I like it. I like my family, I like my dogs, the space I’ve created, where I’m from, driving, the proximity to other places. If I hadn’t liked everything here, I probably wouldn’t have come back. I also know that this isn’t a permanent fix, because there are other things I have on my radar in the future. But for now, it’s working. I’m trying to be a considerate child by doing extra chores around the house and not letting my kombucha brewing overrun the kitchen (btw, kombucha brewing is my new hobby – it’s going questionably).
Most days are good. Sometimes I feel like *wow what the hell am I even doing,* but luckily, that doesn’t happen all too often. I’m going to try and keep it that way.